Rubber Duck Worship

My voice is still gone. Not gone, gone. But my singing voice still sounds like a rubber duck lamely squeaking over ocean waves. But you know what's cool? It doesn't even matter. Sure, it is terribly frustrating. This little sickness is stealing much-needed sleep from me as well as depriving me of half my job. But as I sit here and write this, I am almost laughing. Before I even arrived here (because of my tendency towards paranoia) I thought to myself: Self, what is going to happen if you lose your voice? 'Cause God may just see you through that kind of storm. Sounds like about the kind of thing Satan would want to happen to you. 

Right then I decided that if that happened I would be that seemingly supernaturally-positive person who doesn't care one whit and trusts God through it all. I was almost anticipating it. But the past few days have been difficult! This sickness isn't even that debilitating. I cough at night, I don't sleep much, and my voice is struggling. But it could be soooooo much worse! Even so, I find it hard not to complain. My energy level is slowly returning, but I was so frustrated yesterday about staying behind to rest instead of going to VBS. Deprived of my ability to serve at the level I want, I become disgruntled and purposeless. 

Yet, I preach it to myself even as I pray it in front of the groups: it doesn't even matter. 

It's not about me. And God will receive all the praise, honor, and glory whether my voice works or not! 

And you know what? My voice is improving, slowly but surely! My speaking voice is fine, people are worshipping in spite of a rubber duck worship leader, and God, forever Teacher, is training me to trust Him. And tonight, I've recruited a couple girls in the new team that has come down to serve to help me with worship. I'm excited to let them take the reigns vocally as I play guitar. Yup. God is good. 

Recipe for slight improvement in the voice department: Chamomile Mango tea with a dollop of honey